Alpha The Killer Sloth Is The Next Creature Feature Superstar
(This is an absurd review of an absurd movie, and may or may not contain true facts. If you enjoyed Scream Queens, you’ll like this one. Watch Slotherhouse for yourself, because “why the hell not?”. )
Emily Young, a senior, wants to be elected as her sorority’s president. She adopts a cute sloth, thinking it can become the new mascot and help her win until a string of fatalities implicates the sloth as the main suspect in the murders.
Alpha, a pigmy three-toed sloth from the Panama jungle, was rescued from an exotic pet dealer in 2015 when his poaching business was discovered by local authorities. After spending some time in a sanctuary, Alpha realized she wanted to be an actor, and pursued agency across several US states before landing her first onscreen role in a commercial for the San Diego Zoo. When longtime friends and co-creators saw Alpha in action, they knew they needed her for their next project, a horror comedy that would pay homage to several 80s films including Gremlins, Animal House, and ET.
After meeting with Alpha, writer/producer duo Cady Lanigan and Bradley Fowler co-penned Slotherhouse and hired Matthew Goodhue (Woe, Dames) to direct. They wanted the film to be fun, first and foremost, with the same campy feeling as their childhood favorites, but their shared love of the horror genre led to an edgy script and horrific kill scenes that would not pass the American PG-13 rating system. After much back and forth with the production team, they settled on a modernized version of Animal House, centered on a wild, upscale sorority house that is being stalked by a killer sloth.
Slotherhouse is set at the fictional sorority house Sigma Lambda Theta, which is populated by two camps of young women: the vapid bitches led by house Queen Brianna (Sydney Craven), and the underdogs led by Emily (Lisa Ambalavanar). It’s a new school year, and Emily has been tapped by their house mother Ms. Mayflower (Tiff Stevenson) to run against Brianna for Queen during rush week. In a society that rewards those with the most social media followers, though, Emily lacks clout. To remedy this, she adopts Alpha and declares her house mascot, much to the chagrin of her animal-saving bestie, Madison (Olivia Rouyre), who believes Alpha should be returned to her native home. What follows is a Mean Girls-esque race to the top of Mount Popularity, with Alpha supporting Emily all the way.
Alpha shines as the star of the show, seamlessly flowing between humorous scenes where she steals beers and poses for Instagram selfies with sorority pledges and more complicated shots where she must navigate the internet with her claws on a mouse and drive a car. Where she truly steals the stage, though, is in her expert execution of the physically demanding kill scenes. She poses under Goodhue’s lens through dramatic close-ups, sometimes hanging off of furniture by one paw, never wavering in intensity, focused on slashing throats and terrifying her viewers. Her performance grows progressively throughout the film as the focus leaves the sorority election and her scenes are extended, right up to the final scene (which leaves room for a sequel, no spoilers!).
Slotherhouse is technically sound, with tight camera work, excellent use of light and shadow to create dread, and a soundtrack that would work in a non-comedic thriller, as well. Alpha’s co-stars weren’t built to have much character, but Emily is loveable enough as the protagonist, and Brianna is absolutely deplorable. The secondary characters are hit-and-miss but mostly not memorable. The entire cast does their best, but starring alongside Alpha placed them in the back seat from the start. Alpha’s playful nature is used in the script to win more sorority pledges than any previous year, and the merchandise “created” by the sisterhood in her image is available to purchase online at https://slotherhouseofficialshop.com/.
You can follow Alpha on social media, and we recommend that you do. This young sloth’s star is only just beginning to shine, and we can’t wait to see what her next project might be.
https://www.instagram.com/alphathekillersloth/
https://twitter.com/AlphaKLRSloth
Don’t rush, die slow.
#rushsloth
#AlphatheKillerSloth will be trending online everywhere after the Panamanian star’s film debut in Slotherhouse (2023), releasing on Feb 12th on Amazon here. Originally released by Gravitas Ventures in the USA, Slotherhouse joins other creature feature greats like The Blob and Llamageddon as what is sure to become the next cult classic.
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Kate’s love of all things dark began as a child and deepened when she realized what being an adult meant. She was born with a pencil in her hand and loves nothing more than writing horrific stories to tantalize her inner demons. Kate lives in Hamilton, Ontario Canada with her husband and her boys, stirring up trouble wherever she can.